We're number one! Go Missouri!
Fact for the day: In 2004, Missouri ranked #1 for meth lab incident in the nation with a grand total of 2, 788, beating out Iowa who only had 1,335 (losers!). And we are also leading the nation in meth lab seizures. Two points for Missouri! Which leads me to this story...
I pull into my subdivision and, much to my surprise, the road to my house is almost completely blocked by a swarm of vehicles parked outside my neighbors' house; three cop cars, one white van, two other cars, a mini-van, one truck parked in their driveway and one truck in their grass, and a black SUV parked in the grass in front of my house. I squeeze my car around them and park in my driveway. Five cops are standing in the midst of the cars, all wearing bullet proof vest with "POLICE" written across the chest. Brief history of my neighbors: a grandmother, mother, and daughter use to live there, but the grandmother moved to Florida, I think, and left the house to her daughter, who let her boyfriend and company move in. There is probably 8 people living there now; all lacking hygiene and good manners. My sisters and I have been victim to many a cat calls from the inhabitants there. My family refers to that house as the "white trash" house, or "honky house" if you prefer. Anywho, I walk over to the black SUV, and yelled to the cops, "Excuse me, can I ask you a question?"
"Sure, come on over!" one yelled back.
"Um, is there anything I should be concerned about?"
The cop laughed, "well, not really, maybe the black SUV parked in your front yard..."
Ha...ha... courtesy laugh...
Just then a canine unit showed up. And me being the street-savy girl that I am, put two and two together. Way to keep Missouri #1! Eat that, Iowa!
I pull into my subdivision and, much to my surprise, the road to my house is almost completely blocked by a swarm of vehicles parked outside my neighbors' house; three cop cars, one white van, two other cars, a mini-van, one truck parked in their driveway and one truck in their grass, and a black SUV parked in the grass in front of my house. I squeeze my car around them and park in my driveway. Five cops are standing in the midst of the cars, all wearing bullet proof vest with "POLICE" written across the chest. Brief history of my neighbors: a grandmother, mother, and daughter use to live there, but the grandmother moved to Florida, I think, and left the house to her daughter, who let her boyfriend and company move in. There is probably 8 people living there now; all lacking hygiene and good manners. My sisters and I have been victim to many a cat calls from the inhabitants there. My family refers to that house as the "white trash" house, or "honky house" if you prefer. Anywho, I walk over to the black SUV, and yelled to the cops, "Excuse me, can I ask you a question?"
"Sure, come on over!" one yelled back.
"Um, is there anything I should be concerned about?"
The cop laughed, "well, not really, maybe the black SUV parked in your front yard..."
Ha...ha... courtesy laugh...
Just then a canine unit showed up. And me being the street-savy girl that I am, put two and two together. Way to keep Missouri #1! Eat that, Iowa!
posted by Erin | 5:06 PM
3 Comments:
Ha. Well let me be the first say (and i think Cade will agree) that this is the only time I will gladly root for Missouri. You numba 1!!!!
"Meth Lab" sounds really "Secret evil empirish" but it is really like a bathtub, a stove, and some cleaning solution.
And wife-beaters... I almost for got the secret ingredient.
James- gee... thanks for the support...
Lucas- I agree; I think the "lab" part makes it sound like some intelligence would be involved, so I must admit that it was quite the let-down.
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